![]() It is now four years later, but I find myself asking the same question more and more: Why are we so accepting of music that acts as a call to solidarity around unhealthy relationships instead of recognizing the inherent danger in the behaviors therein? “I keep, keep bleeding love.” With my phone in my hand, I sit there wondering why, if my darling can see herself mirrored fully in the lyrics of this song, how does she not understand that she deserves better? How does she not recognize Lewis’ song as a warning against danger? ![]() “You cut me open and I keep bleeding,” she cries, using Leona’s voice as a disguise. I imagine that she hopes that her girlfriend will hear it and then recognize her abusive behavior, perhaps rectifying it. Clearly, this ringback tone is a passive-aggressive attack against her girlfriend, albeit thinly-veiled. Leona Lewis croons from the other end, as I wait for my beloved to pick up the line. ![]() In 2008, ringback tones are a thing (they’re not still, right?), and so every time that I call her, I am forcibly reminded of her situation. And not least of all of her attributes, she has something else, too, that makes my desirous heart ache: a girlfriend – and one who doesn’t treat her with the respect that she deserves, at that – one who is manipulative and secretive and controlling. With a bright smile and a disarming demeanor, she is the kind of feminine divine that inspires poetry. She would have been my awakening had I not already known that I was attracted to women. She has skin the color of milk chocolate, smooth and melting, and a chunk of magenta dyed into her faux hawk. It’s 2008, and I have a crush on a girl who is tall and lean – like a cowboy with her humble swagger, except for her perfectly placed, undoubtedly womanly curves. They try to pull me away, but they don’t know the truth” ![]() “But I don’t care what they say - I’m in love with you Blogger Melissa Fabello explores the influence of pop music on teen perceptions of dating violence, and what we can do to help. ![]()
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